I saw a post today on my FACEBOOK and saved it so I could reference it for my own post here; I felt incredibly inspired and obligated to follow suit, I have even decided to post my own picture along the same lines of this post. [ I have been writing a lot about self love, and body image, but I feel we all need listen, learn and go for it; love ourselves ] We as women are hard on ourselves. We compare, we self-shame [ with the unfortunate help of others at times ], we hold ourselves to impossible standards. Even when we are doing good for ourselves and our bodies, we still feel inadequate and things just don’t look how you thought they would to begin with. And we need to stop. We are enough. We are beautiful. We are strong. We are not defined by our looks. We have more than that to offer the world.
I know this may be obvious to a lot of people reading this but these days there are so many images floating around the web universe of what is perceived to be the ‘perfect body’. People are in their perfectly posed pictures, in the perfect lighting with filters and photo shopping if you have that feature available to you; all this added into the mix. The problem with this is people [ specifically young women/teenagers ] compare themselves to those perfectly posed bodies and wonder why they don’t look like that too. We get dressed in the morning and look BOMB AF in a crop top and ripped jeans and then we sit down or stand the wrong way/angle and we have a roll or two. Most of it is just skin [ and we know that ] and the skin has to go somewhere when it not stretched out while we are standing, hence the ‘rolls’; again we know this but it doesn’t stop us from cracking down on ourselves. Not all of us have ripped abs, and toned bodies. And, I am not saying its unrealistic to have abs or that you can’t be healthy and happy with them, because duh, of course you can, [ I am just saying that you don’t need abs or a magically toned body to be happy ]
You see images on Facebook, Instagram and other social media that collect thousands of likes and break the hearts of all donut lovers; girls envy those perfect bodies and go on diets and spend hours in gyms to look the same, or have some of those similar features they saw in one little image. Yet, for most, it hardly works for them or we happen to give up before we get anywhere [ 30 sit ups doesn’t instantly mean abs the next day ]. Behind those chiselled, perfect bodies, there are days when things don’t look like they do in that picture. Its not an everyday perfect body life. The thing is that every body looks different and is built differently. Nobody’s booty looks round and peachy from all the same angles. Don’t eat less or miss out on your favorite meals or over exercise to look good or to look good in a bikini because there will always be angles that are unflattering that might make you feel bad when you see them [ fit or not; we all have good angles and bad angles ]. Start loving and accepting your body at all angles [ know what angles are the best when you need them for those selfies! ] with all your ‘flaws’, instead of trying to fit into society’s image of ‘beauty’ because that image isn’t inclusive of all individuals, which makes society so messed up. Don’t hate yourself because of a bad photo, they do not define you as a person. You look best when you are living life to the fullest and happiest and it will show in your body actions and physique. There no point in missing out on things and stressing yourself out; stress is an unhealthy diet. Happiness can do you wonders. Life isn’t meant to be a competition on who can look the best and we should normalize not having to ‘look perfect’ all the time because it’s a ridiculous concept.
Let’s be real you take a hundred pictures [ trial selfies ] before you post the best picture; the best posed, put together, more attractive one [ no double chins, booty popping, slimmest angle #guilty ]. Contrary to what society has taught us to think, our worth isn’t measured by how many belly rolls we have, or how many dimples we have on our booty and legs, or how much jiggle hangs out on our arms. Loving ourselves exactly how we are is hard because we have been told for years that we are not good enough until we are a picture perfect Kardashian [ insert any other ideas of perfection that have been fed to us over the years ] But I call BS; I say that the real magic happens when we embrace who we are, at every angle and size. When we are the happiest and live life the fullest. This doesn’t mean we don’t struggle with embracing this body we were given, but it does mean that we are understanding that working on loving our image is the most important job that we will ever have as women in this world we live in. Our bodies aren’t broken even when that’s the message society is trying to tell us, [ by airbrushing everything, erasing dimples, rolls and fluff with photo shop ].
Note: This is me, within the same hour for this blog specifically; same person, different angles. My pictures were taken seconds apart. [ with a little adjustment to show the point ] I adjusted my body and different angles that’s it [ I have NEVER step foot in a gym; I have just learned to work with what I got, fake it until you make it kind of deal; I am proud of my body. Or at least I am working on it ]. If you are a girl, you probably know all the struggles already. Stand slightly to the side, not face on, twist your torso to give yourself a smaller waist, sit your body back a little, BOOM! Fit as a fiddle. No one would know the difference, until you post the bad angles and show the world. [ as I have done now, no shame ]. Its hard to post a pictures that are unflattering, but this has changed my outlook and I hope it changes others.
I have learned not to stress over things about my body that are natural and normal and most importantly things I CAN’T CONTROL. Could I whine about it more because other girls don’t seem to have as bad as symptoms? Sure. Does it help anything? NO. Women experience annoying bodily changes weekly, daily even hourly; some of those treacherous changes include bloating, eating too much, that ‘time’ of the month, cramps, etc. Our bodies are constantly changing, everyday and every hour and usually there is nothing we can physically do about it. Don’t let a bad body image day get you down and make you think you need to crash diet or exercise excessively [ nothing leggings, a cardigan and a fluffy scarf can’t fix in a flash ]. Look at your body and know that what you are looking at is perfectly normal. It is what makes you, you. We are all different, we shouldn’t have to conform to one ideal body type. Diversity is beautiful and so is being unique. Feel confident with your body whether it is flexed or relaxed. No amount of fat, loss or muscle gain will make you happy if you aren’t comfortable with your image in the first place.
So even though it is really hard, lets remember we are worthy and beautiful and special and ALIVE. Love yourself today, because THAT shit is what is inspiring.