there’s no one alive that is youer than you.

My dear little Lennox;

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How is it even possible that you are already turning three years old?! [ December 18 ] It feels like just yesterday [ cliché but true ] you were toddling around, muttering words and sounds, no one understood. Now you are a full on boy who runs, jumps, sings, speaks in full sentences, asks questions and is constantly absorbing the world around you. A minute ago, we were celebrating the fact that you were finally walking; and now? You’re totally fearless; a true thrill seeker. You climb to the highest points of all the playgrounds; you love hanging upside down on the couch so all the blood rushes to your head; you’re always doing things that make me nervous, and you know it too. Pushing the boundaries; being a boy. Following your brother in everything he does. You laugh contagiously.  You are starting to tell funny kid jokes. Your imagination is running away to far away lands of pirates, knights, and pretty princesses. You make us hide from bears and be quiet around the mean giant.  Every day is a new adventure.

You spread so much joy to those who know you.

On your third birthday, I find myself wanting to celebrate YOU.

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There’s not much you don’t love doing [ except going to sleep, you’ll never admit when you’re tired and you’ll argue until you can’t anymore ]. Golf, baseball, basketball, soccer, hockey, bowling, even hopscotch. Doing somersaults. You love playing hide and seek. Sometimes you lose interest mid-way through the game and forget to come find me, but I’ll forgive you because you’re cute.

A few months ago, it hit me how independent you’ve become. You don’t need me for everything anymore, and that’s hard on a mom. I thought parenting would get easier; it has in many ways, but sometimes I miss the days when you couldn’t do anything without me. Seeing you grow into this well-mannered, loving, kind-hearted person, making friends on your own, developing your own identity, your own jokes, your own laugh, a great imagination and ambition to try to do everything yourself; I love the person you’ve become, but can you slow down a little? [ pretty please ] I find myself holding you a little longer, staring at your sweet face longer; cherishing every little detail, everyday.

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The thing about you that’s never changed is your excitement over everyday things, like fruit snacks. You still eat them almost every day yet still react like it’s the first time. You have what we call your “excited face” and it’s truly the best. It’s the same excitement when I come home from work: “Mommy, here me!!!” If everyone could be half as happy as you, the world would be a better, safer place. And even though you’re less excited when I leave for work, I know deep down you understand; you understand I come back every time.

At three years old, you are separate from me. You are your own unique individual, and here’s the kicker you’re awesome. And it is SO awesome, because you’re my baby, MY son. As you’ve grown more independent and your specific personality has emerged stronger and stronger, I find myself marveling at how incredible of a person you are. I’ll never know if it’s true or not, but I believe that even if you weren’t my kid I’d still want to play hide-and-seek with you, sing Five Little Monkeys with you; just to hang out with you! You’re that much fun to be around.

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No matter how hard the week was, or how hard the year’s been for us, you will always put a smile on my face. You are the reason I can get through the tough times; you’re my motivation for everything. I’m grateful every day of my life for this amazing, perfect little creature I’ve created. You have make me the happiest and most fulfilled mother in the world.

Now that most signs of the newborn baby have faded. You smell different. Your baby cheeks are almost completely gone. There are no rolls of pudgy toddler. You are my boy. My sweet, sweet boy. [ How has it been THREE YEARS? ] As much as I miss the days that have passed, I am loving the moments now.  Especially when you say, “I love you mom” and throw those little arms around my neck. Heart melting. I am excited to see what lies ahead for you forever on.  I have big dreams for you my son and can’t wait to hear what your dreams are as you mature.

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My love for you today is based strongly on who you are as your own person, rather than on the simple fact that you’re my son. The coolest part about that marvel is the realization that its only going to keep growing. As you continue to grow and develop, so will the way I love you. As your likes and dislikes become more known, as you face successes, challenges and disappointments in life; my heart will expand to new places too. And then one day I will wake up and you won’t be my baby anymore, you’ll be a grown adult; one that I hope to love not only as a son but also as a friend.

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So, I guess my message to you on your third birthday is simply this: You are awesome. Your boundless energy, your sweet demeanor, your creative spirit; it all comes together to make you a truly remarkable little human being. I feel privileged to be your mother. From a parent’s perspective, it doesn’t get any cooler than that. As you journey into this next little kid year; which I’m sure will be full of threenager attitude, with some terrible days thrown in for good measure. I’m filled with anticipation to watch you become more and more uniquely you. My heart will be right there, growing alongside you, my love spreading to cover every new inch of you. Have fun. Play hard. Stay sweet.

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I love you, my awesome son.

Happy 3rd Birthday Benny Boy!

All my love,

Mom

 

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